Poly Musings

[foxgrrl]

[I don't have a lot of time, so I'll keep this brief.]

Recently, several friends of mine [probably reading this now], and I, have been trying to figure out if we are officially dating or not. I'm currently in a relationship with Nyah [whimsywanderer], and I don't want to leave her, but society has taught me from birth to be insanely devoted to your only partner. And that cheating on your partner is the more horribly unimaginable crime ever — grounds for murder and divorce. Some of the other people involved are also in their own open/poly relationships, so it's ok for them to date me… But I still fear that I'm comiting some horrible crime against their other partners.

Comments

[oygevalte.livejournal.com]

I was going to reply to this, after readin the posts of the others, but the text is so small I can't even make it out with a magnifying glass. :/

My take, in any case, is that people are responsible for their own relationships. If they are dishonest or otherwise fuck things up with another mate because of how they handle being with you, that's THEIR fault, not yours. You trust and respect those people enough to let them make their own choices about handling their own other relationships, and if they don't, how is that your fault? Their responsibility level is not your bailiwick.