Poly Musings

[foxgrrl]

[I don't have a lot of time, so I'll keep this brief.]

Recently, several friends of mine [probably reading this now], and I, have been trying to figure out if we are officially dating or not. I'm currently in a relationship with Nyah [whimsywanderer], and I don't want to leave her, but society has taught me from birth to be insanely devoted to your only partner. And that cheating on your partner is the more horribly unimaginable crime ever — grounds for murder and divorce. Some of the other people involved are also in their own open/poly relationships, so it's ok for them to date me… But I still fear that I'm comiting some horrible crime against their other partners.

Comments

[shatterstripes.livejournal.com]

Well. If it's okay with her, and it's okay with the other person, and it's okay with their SO(s)... then the only question that's left is, is it okay with you?

Who will it hurt and how? Will it hurt if you just fall into bed with someone a few times? If they become a major part of your emotional life?

[two-pi-r.livejournal.com]

Oh. Exactly. I wish I knew how to put it in those words.

[shatterstripes.livejournal.com]

Simplicity is always hardest.

[whimsywanderer.livejournal.com]

For the record:

It is ok with me.
I am poly, I do have a boyfriend, and as far as I am concerned I do not consider myself in a 'relationship' with Foxgrrl. More like best friends.

Though it may sound it, there is no confusion or disagreement here. The parameters of the relationship are well understood by both parties. It's just complicated.