"So this is it. We're going to die."

[foxgrrl]

At one point in the last several days, I found myself in a situation where I said to myself: Oh shit! So this is it, this is how I die&hellip […] (Oh, I'm still alive.) In hindsight I wasn't really in any danger. Whenever I have one of these experiences, it really reminds me of just how much I really love being alive despite all the pain. That, and I really feel like I'm not done yet. There's something I'm supposed to be doing on this Earth — I don't know what it is, so I could be doing it right now for all I know.

After the previous time this happened to me (a few months ago), I wrote the following farewell to a friend:

This is Julia. I want you to know that life is a gift, and you should cherish every beautiful moment of it. Be Well.

Another thing that I have observed about myself in these moments, is the entire rest of my brain/mind very rapidly formulating survival plans, to immediately get out of the situation. It's almost like an automatic reflex.

If you've ever found yourself in one of these situations where you've thought to yourself that you were going to die. What were the last thoughts which ran through your head?

Comments

[drewkitty.livejournal.com]

This happens just often enough to keep me on my toes. About 95 to 98% of my brain power is tied up with doing something (or NOT doing something), however. Timing . . . is important.

Thoughts I have actually had include:

1) This is going to look REALLY STUPID on the police report / coroner's report of death. (About to overbalance on a high railing.)

2) This is going to be a big HOW NOT TO for future generations of (EMTs, armed security officers, etc.) . . . (Suppressed to protect the guilty.)

3) Will I go unconscious while I'm flying through the air after being struck, or when I actually hit the ground? (While crossing eight lanes of high speed freeway at night.)

4) Subaru. Why did I stop driving a Subaru? (Dodging an idiot lane changer on a twisty mountain road, driving a 2WD pickup.)